Body Changes At 40

 ..should i be worried or grateful?

Things I experienced this year:

1. I was never really a laksa person growing up. But now I crave for laksa everyday. Not pregnant.

2. I used to drink coffee tds. Morning coffee to wake me up, afternoon to beat the postprandial sleepiness and at night just because I wanted to, somehow I manage to sleep peacefully after that. It was also my emotional support beverage. Happy? Coffee. Sad? Coffee. Stress? Coffee. Took the tagline coffee is lyfe too serious that it led to several episodes of gastritis. But this year, I realised…I can live without it. It started with my laziness to restock coffee at home, then unable to buy it early in the morning. That I resort to take it in the afternoon before the headache kicks in. Then surprise surprise I dont get the urge to chug the whole cup down like always. I drank half, and save the other half for the next day. WHO IS THIS PERSON?

3. I no longer crave sugar. I used to buy cakes/cookies on weekly basis. Is it because I muted all bakery content on IG? 😅

4. I eat so much less now. Usually once a day. Sometimes twice a day but rarely three times. I didnt even eat rendang ketupat lemang lodeh during Raya. So weird cuz I remember the previous raya I made sure I taste all the foods on the table.

5. I lost 7 kg this year. It’s not even half a year yet.

Am I sick? 

Do I have cancer?

Or is this depression?

Loss of appetite, loss of weight..and i do have trouble to sleep lately. But then, I don’t have anhedonia. I still enjoy doing things I love.

So maybe this is just..aging?

Nevertheless, I’m kinda love it. I’m skinnier now. I feel fresher and lighter. Easier to pull myself up during Pilates. Less knee pain. 

It’s as if my body said “New software update installed”.

Anyway, if this is aging, I would like to file a complaint about the insomnia part. I need my sleep. Gonna self prescribe myself melatonin.

Update: I read somewhere about insomnia. As we aged, the circadian rhythm changes. Our body secrete less melatonin, thus difficulty to sleep. So, lets try sleep hygiene and melatonin. Or I can view it as an invitation from Allah to do more tahajud.